Leap Year?

Fear, serious fear is all I have right now.

I don’t have a full-time paying job. I don’t even have a steady part-time job. All my jobs are small. And that scares me. I’m German in heritage. I NEED STRUCTURE.

So, what’s next?

Take on another job?

Or go back to school? (in a sense)

The funds are down, and I’m scared. I don’t know where life is going to take me next. I have the opportunity to go into a Yoga teacher training, but it is SERIOUS money. Money I’m not sure I should spend. I love the school, I love the idea of being a teacher and I love the idea of learning.

I do not love my jobs right now. And, chances are they would not allow me to do the teacher training as well. So, in my heart and in my head I need guidance. Is it WORTH it to me? What is worth? Is it monetary, spiritual, emotional?

I know I don't have a baby, or a cat.

But I do think this sums it up nicely. I’m not at peace when I’m moving, I’m not at peace when I rest. I want to have the power of conviction in the things that I do. I don’t feel powerful in ANY of my jobs right now except for the ones that need me to perform. I love HIT AND RUN and I love DINNER DETECTIVE .

I live in a musical some days

 

I never thought a body outline could bring so much joy

I never thought a body outline could bring so much joy

I have so much to be thankful for in my life, good friends, good family, good life in general. But I want it to be great. I want to be great, outstanding, live with vibrancy and compassion and love! What must I do to have that life?

The only way I could see swinging teacher training is to have a full time 9-5 job that allows me to have some weekend days off. So that is what I ask, that is the desire I’m putting out there to be answered. I am ready for the job that will let me work happily during the day, and let me work toward being a great teacher at night.

If you read this, and you know you can help…if you know of that job, please let me know. I know someone out there has that job waiting for me and I just needed it to be ready and me to be ready for it. So, here we go…time to leap

Now, if I can only look THIS good doing it!

Advertisements

One thought on “Leap Year?

  1. Ann, I can tell you what helped me when I was in a similar situation… I sat down and made two lists.

    The first was everything I wanted to have in my life. It had entries like “I want to learn a foreign language.” “I want to get dressed up and go to fancy parties.” “I want to be able to play a musical instrument.” “I want to travel a lot.” “I want to make a difference.” That sort of thing.

    The second list was every job I had ever considered in my life, no matter how silly. Astronaut, book editor, chef, whatever.

    It took about twenty minutes to compile these lists. Then I looked at them. For me, I realized that I could accomplish most of the things I wanted by being a curator, so I went back to school, even though I didn’t have the money. It’s possible.

    I’m not sure what you’ll find if you do this, but I’m hoping it provides some kind of a map for you. You’re too awesome to have all that uncertainty. I imagine that with your focus directed, you will be a serious force to be reckoned with!

    Anyway, hope it helps. ❤

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s